Four Months Post-Op: Is this thing working?

Zero.  That's how many pounds I have lost in the past month.  Before you start to yell at me saying that I can't just go off the number on the scale, "muscle weighs more than fat," and I need to stop being a Negative Nancy, please know that I'm not.  I'm stating the facts. That I haven't lost any weight this past month.

While I know I have lost inches and feel better about my health than I did a month ago, it still makes me question this whole process and whether the lapband is going to work for me.  The difference between lapband and other weight loss surgeries like gastric bypass and the sleeve is that the others result in immediate and drastic weight loss right from the start.  The moment after surgery, their stomach is smaller and they feel immediate restriction with whatever they put into their bodies.

With Lapband, it's a different story.  You may lose a large amount of weight at the beginning since you are on an all liquid diet for ten days, but once your stomach is no longer inflamed from surgery, you no longer feel that restriction.  I have been able to really eat whatever I want and large amounts of it.  The goal with the lapband is that with each adjustment you start to feel more restriction to where you eat less and you stay full and satisfied for longer periods of time between meals.  You keep going back to the surgeon get more saline put into the band until you are in what they call "The Green Zone."   Here's an illustration below that might explain this a little better:

So where I have been in the past four months is the yellow zone.  I get hungry between meals, am able to eat large portions and, well, haven't lost any weight this past month.  Currently sitting at 221 compared to 251 when I started.   What that really says is the thirty pounds I have lost is really due to the exercise and workouts I have put in and then also eating a bit less than I was.  I may have cut out some of the bad stuff like soda and alcohol (except for a weekend or two), but my eating behaviors haven't changed as much as I thought they would.  Or as much as they probably will once I'm in the Green Zone.

Four-Month Appointment:
So I went back to the doctor on Tuesday where they agreed I wasn't where I needed to be since I have only lost three pounds in the past two months. But in those two months, I've lost over three inches in my waist so obviously I'm making progress, just not on the scale.

They agreed to put another 1cc of saline into my band making it 7.5 total in my band that holds 15. Immediately following my fill, I could already feel restriction that I have not felt since surgery.  I'm not sure if I'm in the green zone yet, but I definitely feel the band working a bit better than it has been.

Here's a view of the progress so far.  You can't necessarily tell a huge difference between May and July, but it is still progress.

Non-Scale Victories(NSV):
One of the greatest things that has happened over the past four months is at some point I stopped being completely self-conscious about how I look(I mean, I shared those pictures above, am I right?!).  If you go in my closet you will find an embarrassing number of cardigans and jackets that I have worn in the past to disguise my weight.  I was disgusted by the fat on my arms and how tight some of my clothes would fit, and cardigans were my way to hide my flaws.  

Since I had surgery, I have been to two weddings, to both of which I wore sleeveless and strapless dresses with no cardigan at all.  Even though I am definitely far from where I want to be, I am finally happy in my own skin.  When I get dressed up or even when I'm wearing workout clothes (which is 98% of the time), I am finally proud of where I am and know that I am the best I can possibly be in that moment.

So I'm going to continue to set goals, like I did with exercising 180 days in a row-- on day 103 today-- and take things one day at a time.  And no matter what that number is on the scale, I'm going to keep going and eventually I'll get to where I want to be.

The Impossible: 90 Days of Exercise

Ninety-one days ago I made a decision.  I was going to work out 90 days in a row.  Up to this point, I had just started walking outside again after having lapband surgery on March 25th and was slowly getting back to feeling normal.  I knew I needed to set a goal.  A challenging, yet reachable, goal.

And in doing so, I found out something I wasn't expecting.  IT'S IMPOSSIBLE.   Not impossible to workout 90 days in a row, but impossible to stop.  

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How I Got Started:
I didn't just start running a 5k on the first day.  Actually, I haven't even done that yet (I'm sure it will be coming up here shortly though.)  I started by walking.  I didn't want to push it too hard at first because I was nervous I would bust an incision and could still feel the presence of the band at the bottom of my esophagus because the swelling hadn't gone down yet.  So I started walking.  My mom or my dad would join me around the 2.17 mile loop at their house.

Walking became a daily occurrence, but I didn't limit myself to that.  My husband and I started playing tennis and can be found laughing and/or cussing up a storm at the Bonne Terre Park several times a week.  It's fun... for the most part. :-)  Neither one of us are pros, but it's physical activity that we wouldn't be getting if we were sitting on the couch watching Netflix.  (Though I'm sure that's where both of us would rather be lately-- we are late to the Breaking Bad party, but it's getting good in Season three!)

                                                         Spike in his stylish sweatband.

I also got a group of girls together to start playing sand volleyball on Thursday nights at the local Pub.  I didn't do it for the beer-- you can find me drinking water inbetween games-- I did it because it was another way to get myself to move.  Another commitment I had to follow through on.  I even started playing on another team so that I can get more exercise in each Thursday night instead of sitting around waiting to play again.

Probably the most important thing I did was join 573fitness.  Ever since this gym opened when I was living in San Francisco or maybe it was Dubuque, I have wanted to be a member.  It was one of the things I was most excited about when we found out we were moving back home.  It all just worked out that our move was at the same time as my surgery so I could join soon after.

This gym is a community of people, including many long-time friends and family of mine, all there with a common goal: to be the best and healthiest they can be.  We do this by lifting weights, running, rowing, and even handstand walks (Well, not me yet, but I have progressed to doing handstand holds against the wall!! woop woop!) among many other activities.   We do WODs(Workout of the Day) and most importantly, we support and push each other to do better than we did the day before.

I didn't show up at the gym able to do everything that was prescribed, and I still can't.  But that's not what this gym or overall crossfit is for.  It is for you to focus on how you can improve in many different areas of lifting and cardio.  It really is all about pushing yourself to do one more rep or one more lap than you did last time. But you must do this in a safe and healthy way.

So for the crossfit-haters-- not everyone is trying to win the next crossfit games, 99% of us are just trying to better ourselves and maybe drop a few numbers on the scale, all while being injury-free.

A Normal Day
My day typically starts with a conference call or a morning run at the Bonne Terre Pond.  I can actually run a ten-minute mile now... something I don't think I've done in my 20's.  Sometimes if I have plans for the evenings, I will go to the Tuesday through Friday morning classes that my friend, Aubrey, holds at the gym.  I work from home so that also allows me to go for a quick run on my lunch break or when I don't have meetings.  In the evenings, I either go to the gym (usually 4 times a week), play tennis, sand volleyball or get talked into playing disc golf with my husband.

I'd say more days than not, I workout or exercise multiple times a day.  And yes, it is important to have rest days-- especially for those athletes who train crazy hard.  But for me, it's more important that I get up and move EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.  So on those days when I really don't feel like going to the gym or running at the pond, I make myself at least walk the loop at my parents' place.

That has really been the game-changer for me.  No matter what, I have to do some type of activity that day.  I no longer allow it to be a choice.  It is a given.  Every day I have to move.  I have to sweat.  I have to progress in my weight-loss and health-gain journey.

It really is that simple.

Day 90
So as I said on Facebook yesterday, I really wanted to do something significant on my 90th day.  Some girls from the gym were going to a competition in Union,  MO, as part of a charity event to help pay for a little boy's bone marrow transplant.  I'm always up for participating in a good cause(You may remember I ran a half marathon back in 2010 as part of Team in Training  for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.), but I had told myself when I started going to the gym that I wasn't going to do competitions.  I only wanted to go to the gym and do the workouts to get in shape.  I didn't care about lifting more than the other people at the gym.

When I found out they had a scaled division, which means the work out is the same but modified or with less weight than the Rx workout, I decided that it would be such a great milestone for me to finish FOUR WODs on my ninetieth day of working out.

Once I got there, it was a blast.  And something else happened I wasn't expecting.  I was determined to win my division.  Not because I wanted to lift more than other people, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.  That I could do anything if I just get out of my head and DO IT.

So I did.  

-- I maxed 125lbs. in clean & jerk.
-- Immediately following, I ran 400 m and did 40 burpees in seven minutes.
-- Next I did 136 reps of 55 lb. Thrusters and 25 lb KB swings in 12 minutes.
-- Then the final three in the scaled division competed for first by doing 5 Rounds of 5 dead lifts, 7 shoulder to overheads and 9 squats, which I finished in 6 minutes and 8 seconds to get first in the competition.

What's Next?
As I said, what I learned in the past ninety days is that I can't just stop after ninety.  Nor do I want to.  Exercise is now an addiction, but more than anything, it is now a part of who I am.  I don't ever again want to be that girl who lets a week go by without even walking more than a hundred yards to and from her car... the next thing you know a month has gone by with nothing to show for it.

So where do I go from here?  I'm not too sure.  I know I need a goal-- that's how I work by having something to drive towards.  So for now, how about 90 more days?  Yeah, that sounds good to me.

Anybody want to join me?